I clearly no longer agree with a younger, dumber, slightly brainwashed version of myself. But I wanted to leave this here so people can see how humans and knowledge and acceptance can develop in an individual.
This thought is in response to France legalising gay marriage. This thought is backed up by things I have read though I cannot remember details of specific studies... I can do a proper one with the studies quoted sometime but the TotD are never meant to be comprehensive, just what I think based on what I have looked up and seen.
So France recently legalised gay marriage, and while the world celebrates (or at least most of it does) I facepalm.
For a long time now I have been anti-gay marriage for a number of reasons.
1. Marriage, by it's definition, is between a man and a woman. Seriously, Google it. It has always been that way and should not change. A relationship, recognised by law, between two consenting members of the same sex is not marriage. It is something else and it should be called something else.
2. Marriage equality makes no sense. A marriage between a man and a women and two men, or two women, cannot be equal. There are things that a man and woman can do that two members of the same sex cannot, for example have children without outside assistance. The status of a marriage and a same sex union cannot be the same. There is a difference and that difference should be recognised and not ignored.
I am aware there are clinics where gay male couples can both fertilise eggs and have twins with one child being one man's and the other the other's but that is still not equal. There is no 'marriage equality' for gay marriages to work the differences need to be noted and worked out.
3. Children: Most people can attest to being somewhat messed up by their parents. Many people have issues resultant from an absent father. Time will tell but I imagine there will be many more issues when a generation is raised by gay parents. Too many no mother or no father issues in that storm.
4. For some people, possibly most, homosexual actions are a symptom of something else going on mentally. I am aware that homosexuality was removed as a mental illness from many psychological organisations world wide and while I'm not technically against this move I do wonder about it.
Recently things like bi-polar disorder, manic depressive disorder and OCD have also been removed from lists of solely psychological disorders. While I don't compare them I do think that the move to acceptance is too fast. It leads to people who just have issues being told they are gay, were born gay and need to accept they are gay and get on with it.
This makes no sense! If they are some issues that are embedded deep in a person's psyche and a symptom of this is to act in a homosexual manner, or have gay feelings, that shouldn't be ignored and once that can be ruled out then look to genetics and environment but don't go there first.
I know, for a fact, there are people who were gay because they were abused by a man when they were younger. This experience, for whatever psychological reason, made them become attracted to people of the same-sex. Others have homosexual tendencies because of father issues (absent dad's). These are real and serious issues that should be dealt with and not swept under a rug because we are accepting.
I think civil unions (not gay marriage, that should never exist) should only be allowed if these issues (if they exist) have been worked on; otherwise it will cause problems later on in life.
5. Because I am a Christian I believe the Bible says it shouldn't be allowed either. That is not an issue that I feel is particularly important when it comes to how laws are effected and decided on in our society. In the same way as I don't anticipate being expected to follow the laws of Saudi Arabia unless I am in Saudi Arabia I don't expect non-Christians to follow the laws of Christianity. So that is a personal thing, that is important to me, but not really a reason that, as a legislator, I would believe to be important.
Here are my thoughts on this (if you don't mind) I was born heterosexual and remain that way. I consider myself lucky. I was born Caucasian into a Caucasian family in a primarily Caucasian country. I was raised, for the most part, a catholic in a catholic country. In short; I fit in with society and I've escaped the endless judgement of others onto others onto others onto others..... in my eyes, homosexual behavior is weird and abnormal. Why? Because I'm straight. Being straight means I will never understand why a man could ever be with another man. Is it really some chemical imbalance in the brain? I dunno. would I donate money for some boffin to find out? Not a chance. This is the ONLY topic (in relation to what the bible says) that I can't get my head around.
ReplyDeleteI don't know whether it was the background pic or your majestic way with words but that post got me wet...
ReplyDelete1) marriage is just a legal term and definitions change. The US had laws which restricted marriage based on colour of skin. Using your argument, that would still happen today.
ReplyDelete2) Many marriages these days don't have kids (is this a lesser marriage to others who have kids)? What about straight couples who require IVF treatment to have kids? Other than this, I can't actually think of what a gay couple can't do that a straight couple can. Both love each other, set up home together, choose dodgy wallpaper for spare room, eat the same food, watch tv, use same washing powder and the millions of other things. Therefore your main argument is basically the vicars "will somebody think of the children" wife from the Simpsons. Which probably says more about your prejudices against gay people rather than ensuring all kids have fun, climb trees, get muddy, cheat homework and stay healthy (with or without eating all their greens)
3) Pretty much same argument as no 2. Everyone has decent parent(s) who loves them & does what they can to ensure they have what they need. Sometimes parents screw up (mine did when they agreed I could have a black carpet in my bedroom - nightmare to keep clean), but it's all trial and error. My best friend was 1 of 3 in a single parent household and he's probably the most normal, level headed and intelligent person I know. On the other hand I know someone who grew up with both parents around but is just unlikeable. Parenting is a skill which isn't taught and a person has to develop it. Yes, parents screw up and kids do as well. Let them, for the vast majority of people a few screams and tantrums solves everything.
4) I've never met a person who said he was gay as a result of OCD, bi-polar or any other mental illness you can think of. From experience (and I suspect for almost everyone else who is gay) we all grew up in a heterosexual home with a mum and/or/without dad perhaps with 1 or 2 siblings. The sons got cars & guns to play with while the girls got Barbie and a wendy house. Basically people are born gay or straight and some are just greedy & like both. Some guys like big hairy men and others like big (less hairy) women. Everyone has a'type' they like & the straight community is probably more diverse in the type of attractions than the gay community (late night Ch4 programmes told me people have many 'interests'). It's probably offensive to the many people who do suffer with illnesses who require help and support from family and friends. Implying its linked to homosexuality is wrong both ethically & morally.
5) There isn't much you can say about gay marriage and the bible that hasn't been said elsewhere. The bible is somewhere between 2,000 and 1,000 years old. There are many different versions (I think the Popes bible will differ from Rev Paisley's) so how can we possibly know which is true? Also remember but the Bible used to only ever be published in Latin. Writing it in another language was against God. But as technology advanced and people got more educated (and Henry VIII split the Church in England and Martin Luther in Germany) different versions of the bible got produced in local languages. The world didn't cave in, and I think living today is a lot better than in 14th Century Europe.
Religion itself is a deeply personal thing. Some people take a lot of comfort from it, while others see no purpose to it. The trick is to develop a happy medium which allows people to worship their religion without infringing the rights of others. I'd say most of the world has done this, some haven't, just like some countries can survive bank crashes while others need to get bailed out.
Ultimately gay marriage is a civil right. It extends a facility that part of the population currently enjoy to everyone who wishes to engage in it. How can that possible be a bad thing? How could a married female gay couple in Sligo possibly affect your enjoyment of God and your life many miles away?